There are some things in life that I don’t mind, especially when compared to dealing with a bored teen. Like a root canal. Or a cold shower when I was really looking forward to a nice, long hot one. Or waiting in line at the DMV with my twin toddlers. You get the idea! Bored teens are no fun and they need a hobby!
But if you ask most teens, they have hobbies alright. Like texting. And getting on social media. And other vague “stuff”. Yeah, ok… I’m not convinced. Your teen needs some direction in finding something meaningful that interests him or her, but he or she doesn’t even know it yet!
So, I’ve compiled some advice for helping your teen find a fulfilling hobby he or she will enjoy and hopefully continue to nurture throughout his or her lifetime:
1. It’s OK to be Bored
First, it’s important to understand that it’s boredom is the springboard for creativity. Don’t feel guilty if your teen is bored. It is not your responsibility to entertain them at all times. You can read more about why I feel teens should experience boredom. In a nutshell, boredom creates an uncomfortable cognitive state that motivates people to want to do something to get out of it. Without boredom, your teen would experience little motivation. So parents, let them get bored and find their own ways out of it! If they become absolutely stuck, they’ll ask for help out of this desolate state!
2. Give Direction in Hobbies
Before you begin to help your teen find a hobby, know that they will need direction. Sometimes teens haven’t developed the critical thinking skills we hoped they would… yet. So, your bored teen may need some guidance to deal with his or her boredom effectively.
If he or she complains of being bored, a) offer to give your teen a task that needs to be done around the house or b) offer your help in finding something he or she may enjoy doing. This will either get some work done on your list or give you time together as you help your teen search for a new hobby.
Either route leads to productivity and togetherness. The likely scenario, however, is that your teen will take you up on offer b). If you don’t know already, ask your teen what his or her interests are, and go from there. Look for books, videos, reference materials, resources, etc., that help develop that interest. A trip to your local library may be enough to really pique your teen’s interest, and the librarian will be able to show you all the available resources to help your teen get started.
If your teen draws a blank, let him or her take a look at this list of fun activities for teens to try.
3. Stress Safe Hobbies
Consider the safety of activities when you help your teen find a hobby. Even though new pursuits are exciting, they can be dangerous at the same time. Remind your teen to be careful when going to unfamiliar places by himself or herself. This includes even the public library or public park. Warn teens of the dangers of meeting online strangers. Know your neighbors. Only allow your teen to offer services (such as mowing or childcare) to those whom you know and trust.
Be aware of any potentially unsafe situation and warn your teen accordingly, especially with online or unfamiliar ventures. Ensuring your teen’s safety as he or she develops a new hobby is crucial, and you can never be too careful.
4. Encourage Healthy Hobbies
As you help your teen find a hobby, try to encourage healthy ones! I personally feel that teens these days don’t fully appreciate the outdoors and nature the way previous generations did. However, many teens today live in areas where appreciating the outdoors can be unsafe or impossible.
Your teen may want to pursue largely electronic or online hobbies or use online resources heavily to learn new hobbies. Don’t immediately discourage it. If you teen wants to take up computer programming or sell digital clip art, that’s great! If he or she enjoys watching videos to learn how to play the violin, that’s wonderful! Just encourage your teen to pursue this new hobby with moderation and to still find time to exercise, eat right, and enjoy the outdoors when possible.
5. Help Find the Value in Hobbies
When you help your teen find a hobby, ask your teen to determine the value in something he or she enjoys. This way, he or she will be more likely to stick with it and develop the activity. Some possible value-added questions to ask your teen are:
- Does the activity stand out on college or job applications?
- Could the hobby turn into a potential career or home-based business, or even just a fun side hustle?
- Is the activity a starting point for a future career?
- Does the hobby offer a service that betters him/herself or society?
- Is the hobby a skill he or she will use for the rest of his/her life?
- Can your teen meet like-minded people with this new activity?
6. Let Them Choose Their Own Path
As parents, we sometimes wish we had “do-over” and are guilty of doing this with our children. We must remember that even though 50% of the genetic makeup of our children comes from us, they may have 0% interest in our hobbies! So, let them choose their own hobbies!
For example, I was an avid basketball player from a very young age. My daughter can’t even jump rope. Do you think I’m going to push her into sports, basketball specifically? Nope! She enjoys making jewelry right now (she’s 6). So I bought her some pony beads and elastic cords and let her imagination go crazy. She spends hours in her room decorating bracelets and necklaces, each with a unique story and pattern. It’s her thing, not mine…but it’s meaningful to her. How do I know? Because she made me a bracelet and told me that when I miss her all I have to do is hold my bracelet and think of her.
Final Thoughts
I think we can all agree that teens need meaningful and useful hobbies, especially as they are approaching adulthood. Hobbies lend themselves to acquisition of critical thinking skills, creativity, perseverance, new experiences, and different viewpoints that make well-rounded individuals. Helping your teen find a productive hobby (other than texting or playing video games all day) will prepare them for adulthood and the rest of their lives.
When you help your teen find a hobby, you will experience special bonding time as you guide your teen to one of the most meaningful activities he or she will engage in over his or her lifetime.